I got to catch the Royal Rumble last night. I won't go into details about the match or event as a whole, but here's a few quick observations.
-I don't buy the Rey Mysterio character. Never have, never will. The underdog thing doesn't do it for me. But, despite that, I loved seeing Rey hit two 619s on Taker to show that Taker probably wouldn't go down with just one.
-Why was the Royal Rumble match all about a guy coming in, hitting a trademark move on everybody in the ring, and then getting attacked by the next guy's move 90 seconds later? And how come the ring never really filled up? Some of those guys should have been in longer (Matt Hardy, Kane, Big Show, Mark Henry, even Beth Phoenix). I know the main story was Shawn Michaels trying to find a way to the Undertaker at WrestleMania, but I wanted to see more from Jack Swagger and CM Punk especially.
That being said, I'm going to ignore whatever plans are in store for Elimination Chamber in 3 weeks, and sketch out my fantasy WrestleMania from bottom to top. I will try to provide a logical portrait of the events that transpired to get us there.
Since I haven't bought Snow Leopard to run Windows on my Mac, I'll just have to do this without booking EWR. Plus I don't even think some of these guys (Ted, Yoshi, Ryder, etc.) would be in that game unless I downloaded a special roster.
Money in the Bank Ladder Match
Drew McIntyre vs. John Morrison vs. Shelton Benjamin vs. Matt Hardy vs. Kofi Kingston vs. Zack Ryder vs. Yoshi Tatsu vs. Evan Bourne vs. Rey Mysterio
Spotfest city!
WWE Unified Tag Team Championship Match
The Hart Dynasty vs. CM Punk & Luke Gallows (c)
I would hope, with the recent return of Bret Hart, that this is where he'd come into play. I think all of these guys could have a good tag title match since there seems to be (just slightly) more emphasis on tag teams.
ECW Championship
Vance Archer vs. Christian (c)
I think after Vance Archer (the former Lance Hoyt) finishes up with Benjamin, he may be the next in line for the ECW title.
Randy Orton vs. Ted DiBiase
I'd like to see them tease where Cody would go between these guys. Cody would finally align himself with somebody during this match, effectively ending Legacy as a unit.
WWE United States Championship
Jack Swagger vs. The Miz (c)
My guess is that even though they are technically heels, more fans would cheer for the Miz at this point. I like the two of these guys, but I'm not sure of the backstory here.
WWE Championship
Edge vs. Big Show vs. Chris Jericho (c)
Edge is mad at his partner for bailing on him. When Edge went down so early in their reign as Tag champs, Jericho heeled him and brought out the Big Show as a replacement. A dominant tag team bringing some meaning back to the belts, JeriShow's reign was stopped by DX. Jericho heels Show for not being a good enough partner, and Edge is pissed at the two of them.
That's how the tag situation worked and that's why they're mad. But how does Jericho get the WWE Championship? After having to leave RAW as a result of the tag titles, some guest host says that the only way he can come back is if he can win the Elimination Chamber in February. Thus ends Sheamus's streak as champion.
Clearly, this match was the inspiration for this post since most of my thought went into it.
Shawn Michaels vs. Triple H
As much as I hate to see this feud rehashed, they generally produce good matches. And with the inevitable breakup of the Nth reincarnation of D-Generation X, a program between these two makes sense. My ideal twist for this involves Triple H turning heel on Michaels in his chase to get to the Undertaker for the World Championship.
I don't know where Hornswoggle lies in this, and I don't care.
World Heavyweight Championship
John Cena vs. The Undertaker (c)
I don't know how this would take place. But it's been around 7 years since their last program, so I'd be okay to see another one. I think Cena would have to play the heel in this one due to his mixed reactions. Honestly, John Cena was the only major WWE name I didn't have on this card, but thought he should be on here. But these two are arguably the two most popular stars on the card, and I think this match would be fun for the big-time match feel, if nothing else.
Monday, February 1, 2010
Sunday, January 31, 2010
Old People
In my 2+ years at the grocery store, I've had the (sometimes mis)fortune of meeting a lot of old people. I'm aware that the world, as a whole, is an aging culture, as taught to me several years ago in my sociology class with one fantastic senior citizen in Mr. Chuck Leonard. But for how a town that boasts a high school fed by multiple districts, there are a hell of a lot of old people here.
For some, the IGA is likely their only connection to the outside world. My experience tells me that they just want to get out.
One in particular is a nice older lady. For awhile she came in late at night after I'd sent the last checker home. I'd seen her in a lot, and after a few times, she revealed to me that she'd lost her husband. I don't remember any of the rest of the conversation, but figured this might have to do with the fact that some older folks come in every day of the week.
But once isn't enough for a particular old man, who in one shift I've seen come in at least twice and heard he was already there before I've gotten there. He's a shy guy but he'll always flash his smile. Despite coming in multiple times a day, he's got a wife. So I really can't figure out why he's in there. One would guess he might want to escape from her, but he usually ends up dialing the Missus for one reason or another.
The real inspiration for this post came from working Friday morning. I'm going to backtrack and say that the night crowd I'm used to working with is, on the whole, a more youthful crowd, with the biggest exception being two people who work third shift at the nursing home. One regularly buys a few items and never wants her receipt. The other usually only buys candy, paid for with a crisply bent dollar or two, plus change from his leather zip-up wallet.
But I digress.
While nightside is by and large a more youthful crew, it does have its old people. But not nearly as many in the morning. And, in my experience, old people in the morning are grumpy and unwilling to help me or themselves.
I was stocking the shelves with items freshly delivered that morning. I caught eyes with an old lady and thought, as a manager, I should smile at her and say hi. She thought, as a customer/old lady, she would just glare back at me. No smile, no wave, not even a blink. I kept walking.
Later on I encountered an old man. This particular one felt, despite the narrow aisles of the store, he was required to take up what little room there was with his cart while bent over looking for the cheapest can of soup. Carrying something which required both arms and knowing I'd never make it through the sliver of empty space he left, I said, "Excuse me," which got him to slowly turn around and look at me. I readjusted what I was carrying and had to move this man's cart for him.
I should probably use this point to stop and discuss old people driving - not long, but just enough. Ambling with canes, heads cocked to the side and leaning on the cart just to stay on two legs, it is my belief that folks who can barely walk should not be behind the wheel of a 2,000-pound motor vehicle. At least they're driving slow.
I started this post speaking positively of old people and I think I should end it that way, instead of just badmouthing them.
This one particular old guy came into the store to get some water softener salt. He came in, paid for it, and when the two workers were loading it up for him, he noticed a difference in what the sheet of paper said above the salt outside the store and the price it rang up at. It took me awhile to figure out what he was getting at (old people have a weird way of asking for things. One guy said "yeah, gimme a couple lottery tickets." "I'm sorry, how many?" "TWO!" Just tell me two in the first place, old man.)
I finally figured it out and he goes, "I don't mean to be a bitch..." and I had to go back inside because I was laughing so hard at those words coming out of this guy's mouth.
He was refunded his money and sent on his merry way.
For some, the IGA is likely their only connection to the outside world. My experience tells me that they just want to get out.
One in particular is a nice older lady. For awhile she came in late at night after I'd sent the last checker home. I'd seen her in a lot, and after a few times, she revealed to me that she'd lost her husband. I don't remember any of the rest of the conversation, but figured this might have to do with the fact that some older folks come in every day of the week.
But once isn't enough for a particular old man, who in one shift I've seen come in at least twice and heard he was already there before I've gotten there. He's a shy guy but he'll always flash his smile. Despite coming in multiple times a day, he's got a wife. So I really can't figure out why he's in there. One would guess he might want to escape from her, but he usually ends up dialing the Missus for one reason or another.
The real inspiration for this post came from working Friday morning. I'm going to backtrack and say that the night crowd I'm used to working with is, on the whole, a more youthful crowd, with the biggest exception being two people who work third shift at the nursing home. One regularly buys a few items and never wants her receipt. The other usually only buys candy, paid for with a crisply bent dollar or two, plus change from his leather zip-up wallet.
But I digress.
While nightside is by and large a more youthful crew, it does have its old people. But not nearly as many in the morning. And, in my experience, old people in the morning are grumpy and unwilling to help me or themselves.
I was stocking the shelves with items freshly delivered that morning. I caught eyes with an old lady and thought, as a manager, I should smile at her and say hi. She thought, as a customer/old lady, she would just glare back at me. No smile, no wave, not even a blink. I kept walking.
Later on I encountered an old man. This particular one felt, despite the narrow aisles of the store, he was required to take up what little room there was with his cart while bent over looking for the cheapest can of soup. Carrying something which required both arms and knowing I'd never make it through the sliver of empty space he left, I said, "Excuse me," which got him to slowly turn around and look at me. I readjusted what I was carrying and had to move this man's cart for him.
I should probably use this point to stop and discuss old people driving - not long, but just enough. Ambling with canes, heads cocked to the side and leaning on the cart just to stay on two legs, it is my belief that folks who can barely walk should not be behind the wheel of a 2,000-pound motor vehicle. At least they're driving slow.
I started this post speaking positively of old people and I think I should end it that way, instead of just badmouthing them.
This one particular old guy came into the store to get some water softener salt. He came in, paid for it, and when the two workers were loading it up for him, he noticed a difference in what the sheet of paper said above the salt outside the store and the price it rang up at. It took me awhile to figure out what he was getting at (old people have a weird way of asking for things. One guy said "yeah, gimme a couple lottery tickets." "I'm sorry, how many?" "TWO!" Just tell me two in the first place, old man.)
I finally figured it out and he goes, "I don't mean to be a bitch..." and I had to go back inside because I was laughing so hard at those words coming out of this guy's mouth.
He was refunded his money and sent on his merry way.
Sunday, January 24, 2010
John Cena wins match but not WWE title, Kofi and Orton have match of the night
Results from RAW Live
Sunday, January 24, 2010
Assembly Hall - Champaign, IL
1. Chris Masters d. ??? with the Master Lock. We arrived as this match was ending and I couldn't quite see who Masters was wrestling.
2. Mark Henry & Evan Bourne d. Legacy after a slam from Henry. I thought Legacy did a lot of good classic (ie, "vintage") heel moves (a sore knee from Ted and them yelling at the crowd) that made people want to see Henry and Bourne win even more.
The Miz came out to talk about being a fighting champion and how much better he is than MVP.
3. The Miz d. MVP, Carlito and Primo to retain the United States title after MVP hit the Playmaker on Carlito and the Miz shoved him out of the ring to get the pin. Lots of throwing one or two guys out of the ring for some one-on-one action. But, to their credit, they all did a pretty sweet Tower of Doom suplex on the Miz. I've never seen WWE do that in all the events I've been to.
4. Gail Kim & The Bella Twins d. Alicia Fox, Jillian Hall and Maryse (I think). Santino Marella was the guest referee and got involved.
5. Jack Swagger issued an over-the-top-rope challenge to hype the Royal Rumble. He was quickly disposed of by the Big Show.
6. Randy Orton d. Kofi Kingston after two RKOs. Lots of near-falls and finishes and was probably the match of the night. I noticed there were definitely a lot more boos for Orton than there were cheers for Kofi. Not a lot of people seemed to rally for Kofi, and Orton had a very mixed reaction (with more boos than cheers, though).
7. John Cena d. Sheamus by DQ in a WWE title match. The match itself was pretty boring and repetitious. Sheamus would perform a hold for awhile or a series of moves only for Cena to fire back and get trapped by Sheamus again. The ending saw Sheamus shove the referee, and as Cena tripped him into the STF, Sheamus tapped and the ref got up to call for the bell. People were going nuts thinking Cena won, only to really boo Sheamus hard when he retained the belt.
Afterwards, John Cena gave Sheamus the Attitude Adjustment, did some posing and gave high-fives around ringside.
Other notes:
-Kelly Kelly was the guest hostess. All she did was let a kid be the guest bellkeeper for the Legacy match.
-Hornswoggle and Kelly threw out merchandise before intermission.
-Triple H was advertised to wrestle the Big Show, so I thought he might've been reshuffled to the main event. I bet a lot of kids were disappointed because there were DX glowsticks everywhere.
Monday, January 18, 2010
What others are thinking
I've had the opportunity to be at a few parties in my day. As normal as some of the behavior is to me (headbanging, moshing, property damage, violently screaming, rented wheelchairs), I realize it's got to be shocking for the typical beer pong player to witness some of this.
My friends have asked me a lot lately, as somebody who chooses to stay sober, what a party with them is like. My response: unless any of the above outrageous things are happening, a party usually sucks for me. I've come up with an intense gang of hellraisers and for me to settle with anything less isn't satisfying anymore.
Even more than my reaction (since I know my friends and what they're capable of doing), I've really got to wonder what other people think.
So over the last couple of weeks I've compiled a list of people who have never met the group as a fully functioning world-wrecking unit yet to see what might be going through their minds watching the mayhem unfold.
Handlebar dude:
I just showed up at this party with my Natty Light. I walk into a room labeled 'The VIP Lounge' and half a dozen guys are congratulating my handlebar mustache. Weird, but, I'll roll with it. They ask me where I'm from so I tell them. None of them know where it is so they're not interested.
But I'll be damned if I won't have a fun time. Clearly these people love my choice in facial hair. I'll use that to my advantage to make friends with every last one of these people.
Girl whose boobs are almost out because she wears a tube top to this party and wrestles one of the more insane people of the group:
I just got to this party a few minutes ago. For some reason there's a wheelchair here but nobody is handicapped from what I can tell. Whatever, I'm gonna get drunk as fuck.
It's been awhile and I'm pretty loose. I'm with my friend, and this guy we met just took my show. Time to wrestle! He's a wiry dude and I think I'm into him. The three of us grapple for about 5 minutes before I get my shoe back.
Now a long-haired beared maniac has taken possession of the wheelchair and is spinning around doing wheelies.
Oh no, the afro'd bastard just suggested he do a kegstand in a wheelchair...
WHAT ARE THEY DOING?!
Pissed Off Bro:
I'm playing a game of beer pong and I see these dudes walk in. One of the guys seems to know somebody else. Whatever. Just don't wreck my streak bro.
Aw fuck, I dunno who this assclown is. But these ugly motherfuckers have him up and he's doing a kegstand. Did this guy pay anything?
On second thought, he clearly didn't. He just left. What the fuck? Well, he's gone, but his friends are still here. One of them is drinking straight from the nozzle on the keg. And another one is pouring it into one of our kitchen cups. That's it, I'm gonna punch these guys in the face.
Wait, where'd they go? I hope they didn't take that cup with 'em.
Pissed Off Bro #2:
So I'm dancing to this shitty rap music. It's so loud the neighbors probably can't hear their shitty metal music over it. Yes!
The door is open to this place and there's a dude in a wheelchair being pushed in. All these people are chanting "Let him party!" What a buncha assholes. Hey, who the FUCK let these guys in here?
WHO LET ALL YOU UGLY MOTHERFUCKERS IN HERE?! This is a bro party!
I dunno who the guy was with the afro, but I'm gonna go kick his ass later on tonight. Fuck these guys.
My friends have asked me a lot lately, as somebody who chooses to stay sober, what a party with them is like. My response: unless any of the above outrageous things are happening, a party usually sucks for me. I've come up with an intense gang of hellraisers and for me to settle with anything less isn't satisfying anymore.
Even more than my reaction (since I know my friends and what they're capable of doing), I've really got to wonder what other people think.
So over the last couple of weeks I've compiled a list of people who have never met the group as a fully functioning world-wrecking unit yet to see what might be going through their minds watching the mayhem unfold.
Handlebar dude:
I just showed up at this party with my Natty Light. I walk into a room labeled 'The VIP Lounge' and half a dozen guys are congratulating my handlebar mustache. Weird, but, I'll roll with it. They ask me where I'm from so I tell them. None of them know where it is so they're not interested.
But I'll be damned if I won't have a fun time. Clearly these people love my choice in facial hair. I'll use that to my advantage to make friends with every last one of these people.
Girl whose boobs are almost out because she wears a tube top to this party and wrestles one of the more insane people of the group:
I just got to this party a few minutes ago. For some reason there's a wheelchair here but nobody is handicapped from what I can tell. Whatever, I'm gonna get drunk as fuck.
It's been awhile and I'm pretty loose. I'm with my friend, and this guy we met just took my show. Time to wrestle! He's a wiry dude and I think I'm into him. The three of us grapple for about 5 minutes before I get my shoe back.
Now a long-haired beared maniac has taken possession of the wheelchair and is spinning around doing wheelies.
Oh no, the afro'd bastard just suggested he do a kegstand in a wheelchair...
WHAT ARE THEY DOING?!
Pissed Off Bro:
I'm playing a game of beer pong and I see these dudes walk in. One of the guys seems to know somebody else. Whatever. Just don't wreck my streak bro.
Aw fuck, I dunno who this assclown is. But these ugly motherfuckers have him up and he's doing a kegstand. Did this guy pay anything?
On second thought, he clearly didn't. He just left. What the fuck? Well, he's gone, but his friends are still here. One of them is drinking straight from the nozzle on the keg. And another one is pouring it into one of our kitchen cups. That's it, I'm gonna punch these guys in the face.
Wait, where'd they go? I hope they didn't take that cup with 'em.
Pissed Off Bro #2:
So I'm dancing to this shitty rap music. It's so loud the neighbors probably can't hear their shitty metal music over it. Yes!
The door is open to this place and there's a dude in a wheelchair being pushed in. All these people are chanting "Let him party!" What a buncha assholes. Hey, who the FUCK let these guys in here?
WHO LET ALL YOU UGLY MOTHERFUCKERS IN HERE?! This is a bro party!
I dunno who the guy was with the afro, but I'm gonna go kick his ass later on tonight. Fuck these guys.
Monday, January 11, 2010
A-B-C
I just went to the store to pick up some apple cider. That stuff is just too good. As I was checking out, one of the checkers asked me when I start school again.
In a haze, I forgot what day it was. But it wasn't going to do me any good to remember when this lady kept shouting "Tuesday! It's Tuesday!" in the next lane. I looked over to see a woman about my height, probably in her late 30s and blonde as she unloaded her basket with a few groceries. While she kept shouting at me, I shook myself out of my confused state and wanted to tell this crazy lady today is Monday, but just looked at her and went, "What?"
"ICC starts school on Tuesday."
"Oh, well, I go to Bradley," I said in a moment of clarity. "And we start school on the 21st."
I hate saying where I go to school. Everybody here assumes that college-age kids go to ICC first, probably also assuming they'll fail or drop out and work at a place like the grocery store the rest of their lives. I'm not saying people don't have a right to earn a living, I'm just saying grocery store manager isn't something I still want to be doing when I graduate.
By not going to ICC, I hopefully made this lady feel like an idiot for rudely interrupting my conversation.
On the other hand, what usually happens when saying you go to Bradley is that people act like you had to outlast some sort of battle royal to get into the school.
"Oh, you go to Bradley!"
"No, I go to Bradley," I say.
Luckily for me she shut up and paid for her items, leaving me to wonder why she was so belligerent in telling me when ICC starts school. Maybe she has kids of her own that she wants out of the house. Or maybe she's one of those parents that lives vicariously through her kids, knowing every single appointment they need to meet and weird facts about them.
The soft side of me thinks she was just trying to helpful in my seemingly confused state of mind. Things might've been clearer if this lady wasn't shouting at me in the first place.
If she wanted to help me, she would've shouted, "It's Thursday! Thursday the 21st!"
In a haze, I forgot what day it was. But it wasn't going to do me any good to remember when this lady kept shouting "Tuesday! It's Tuesday!" in the next lane. I looked over to see a woman about my height, probably in her late 30s and blonde as she unloaded her basket with a few groceries. While she kept shouting at me, I shook myself out of my confused state and wanted to tell this crazy lady today is Monday, but just looked at her and went, "What?"
"ICC starts school on Tuesday."
"Oh, well, I go to Bradley," I said in a moment of clarity. "And we start school on the 21st."
I hate saying where I go to school. Everybody here assumes that college-age kids go to ICC first, probably also assuming they'll fail or drop out and work at a place like the grocery store the rest of their lives. I'm not saying people don't have a right to earn a living, I'm just saying grocery store manager isn't something I still want to be doing when I graduate.
By not going to ICC, I hopefully made this lady feel like an idiot for rudely interrupting my conversation.
On the other hand, what usually happens when saying you go to Bradley is that people act like you had to outlast some sort of battle royal to get into the school.
"Oh, you go to Bradley!"
"No, I go to Bradley," I say.
Luckily for me she shut up and paid for her items, leaving me to wonder why she was so belligerent in telling me when ICC starts school. Maybe she has kids of her own that she wants out of the house. Or maybe she's one of those parents that lives vicariously through her kids, knowing every single appointment they need to meet and weird facts about them.
The soft side of me thinks she was just trying to helpful in my seemingly confused state of mind. Things might've been clearer if this lady wasn't shouting at me in the first place.
If she wanted to help me, she would've shouted, "It's Thursday! Thursday the 21st!"
Tuesday, January 5, 2010
TNA vs. WWE
Last night, TNA brought the war against WWE with lots of familiar faces, some fun action, and a good amount of homegrown talent.
WWE countered this with the return of who they call the almost mythical Bret "the Hitman" Hart.
As far as wrestling lore goes, aside from the Undertaker and Kane, the Bret Hart controversy was one of my favorite stories. As I tried to defend the reality of Montreal to my friends last night, none of them (especially my brother) seemed to buy it. I'll take part of the blame, as it's not something I believe can be described in a few sentences.
The point of the Hart "myth," if you will, is that in the 12 years since it happened, it has become a legend.
But that's besides the point of this post.
Last night, most wrestling fans, writers, and even TNA, had decided the privately owned wanted to wage a war against publicly traded WWE. Former ECW owner Paul Heyman thought differently.
He essentially said it boiled down to a war between SpikeTV and USA, not TNA and WWE.
Having read Heyman's thoughts before yesterday, I completely agreed with his thoughts on AJ Styles as compared to Sheamus.
For months TNA has failed to make AJ Styles stand out. Having noticed since AJ reclaimed the belt that he hasn't been pushed nearly as hard as some of the other guys on the roster, I thought it was a bit peculiar that TNA's homegrown champion was getting a second-rate treatment for being the company's most reliable, popular, and arguably most exciting wrestler. And Heyman's right - more people know Sheamus now after a few months than know AJ after being with TNA since 2002.
If anybody, AJ Styles needed to be showcased last night. He was in the main event, but I wish they would've done more with him. I also wish they would've shown more of what TNA was about through video packages, as I'm not sure the matches cut it for people who weren't typically wrestling fans (ie, most of my friends who came over last night).
That said, here are my thoughts on TNA and WWE's shows...
-We were glued to Impact for the first hour since it ran unopposed. I thought the Steel Asylum would have a lot more action, and completely agree with the Impact Zone's chants of "This is bullshit!" when Homicide came in with whatever he had. LAME. But we saw the TNA return of Jeff Hardy. It didn't really make since, but apparently Hardy is coming back into TNA and is looking at the X-Division.
-I would like to have seen this be more of a showcase of the X-Division. These are the most fun guys on the planet to watch do their thing, and within about 10 minutes this match was over.
-How much 5-hour energy does the TNA roster drink? That stuff was everywhere.
-With that motorcade it was almost like Barack Obama was coming to Impact.
-Security wasn't doing that great of a job at Impact. Sure, keep out Mick Foley, but let whoever run rampant in the back attacking people. WAT?
-As I predicted, Hogan came on at 8 in the hopes to run against Bret Hart. Honestly, we only watched the entrances of both, not really getting too much of what they said. We finally settled on the Bret Hart-Shawn Michaels lovefest. No Sharpshooter? Oh well, he'll be back out at the end of the night to do one. Wait, no? Vince McMahon kicks him in the nuts and that's IT?!
-Barbed Wire Massacre and Full Metal Mayhem was on tap for Impact? Sweet! I can't wait! Hang on...you mean while I was watching Bret Hart and Shawn Michaels HUG, Hulk Hogan ripped up the format for the rest of the show? Damn you, Hulk! But I guess he had to after Rhino got hurt. Abyss being in a match by himself doesn't sound all that thrilling.
-But Abyss did show up to wrestle Samoa Joe. I thought it was an okay match - nothing special. My friends were crapping all over Samoa Joe for not being in peak physical condition. I guess if you don't know what Joe is capable of, you'll come to that conclusion.
-So Bobby Lashley finally turns heel. Maybe that guy will finally get a personality in wrestling. Seriously, I can respect that these people try to make a living, but he doesn't sincerely want to wrestle if he's still making contacts to MMA. I can't get behind Bobby Lashley.
-Val Venis was a legitimate surprise, a free agent who is often overlooked. I thought he was great to interact with the Beautiful People. A hell of a lot better than Kip James anyway.
-The last bit of JeriShow vs. DX was pretty sweet. Lots of nearfalls and false finishes. Jericho can't wrestle on RAW again (till he gets drafted at least), so we'll see how he tries weaseling his way back again. Also, was Jericho silently mocking Hogan with those cups to the ear?
-While I enjoyed cameo appearances to make the night have a big-show feel, I hope TNA doesn't have only but a small handful of these guys actually show up again next week. Brian Knobbs can't even walk.
-I loved Angle/AJ but my friends crapped all over it, too. Lots of nearfalls. I can kind of see what they were seeing, as most of the reversals ended up looking the same. I guess we can be thankful for there not being outside interference (minus Flair's glare), but seeing the same counter multiple times got kind of drab.
-We didn't get to see nearly any of Kofi/Orton. I wanted to see this match since the feud has been getting good reviews, but I thought we'd invested too much time into AJ/Angle to switch.
Overall, I thought the night was intriguing for both companies. TNA didn't hit it out of the park with wrestling, but I think made up for that with interest for what is happening between AJ/Flair, who attacked half a dozen wrestlers backstage and what Hogan and Bischoff have in store for the company.
WWE scored a major coup with the Hitman, and even moreso since he'll be around through WrestleMania, apparently. I'm stoked to see Stu Hart get into the WWE Hall of Fame and it will be fun to see where the Hart/McMahon saga goes from here.
If last night was any indication, 2010 is going to be an exciting year for professional wrestling fans.
WWE countered this with the return of who they call the almost mythical Bret "the Hitman" Hart.
As far as wrestling lore goes, aside from the Undertaker and Kane, the Bret Hart controversy was one of my favorite stories. As I tried to defend the reality of Montreal to my friends last night, none of them (especially my brother) seemed to buy it. I'll take part of the blame, as it's not something I believe can be described in a few sentences.
The point of the Hart "myth," if you will, is that in the 12 years since it happened, it has become a legend.
But that's besides the point of this post.
Last night, most wrestling fans, writers, and even TNA, had decided the privately owned wanted to wage a war against publicly traded WWE. Former ECW owner Paul Heyman thought differently.
He essentially said it boiled down to a war between SpikeTV and USA, not TNA and WWE.
"Slowly but surely, Raw's core audience is getting older and older, and the indescribably-important 'youth audience' is not being replenished. Despite World Wrestling Entertainment's Push-to-PG, the Goliath of Monday Night Cable Programming's product is stale, and the terms 'hip,' 'happening,' 'socially relevant' or 'pop culture phenomenon' don't apply to Vince McMahon's flagship cablecast anymore.
Raw, however, remains a powerhouse. Even the much-maligned 'low 3 ratings' are still way better than anything SpikeTV is pushing, and keep in mind Spike is the television home of the Ultimate Fight juggernaut. A decade past its heyday, Monday Night Raw is the driving force behind USA Network's 4th consecutive sweep of the annual Cable Ratings Wars."
Having read Heyman's thoughts before yesterday, I completely agreed with his thoughts on AJ Styles as compared to Sheamus.
"Seriously, how anyone in TNA can look at themselves in the mirror and accept the fact AJ, the promotion's World Champion and one of the most consistent performers in the industry for over half a decade, is not nearly as well known as Sheamus is simply a crime," Heyman said.
"But for Sheamus to be so much better known to the general public at this point in his career than AJ Styles is not only a sign of WWE's marketing success, but TNA's most glaring failure."
For months TNA has failed to make AJ Styles stand out. Having noticed since AJ reclaimed the belt that he hasn't been pushed nearly as hard as some of the other guys on the roster, I thought it was a bit peculiar that TNA's homegrown champion was getting a second-rate treatment for being the company's most reliable, popular, and arguably most exciting wrestler. And Heyman's right - more people know Sheamus now after a few months than know AJ after being with TNA since 2002.
If anybody, AJ Styles needed to be showcased last night. He was in the main event, but I wish they would've done more with him. I also wish they would've shown more of what TNA was about through video packages, as I'm not sure the matches cut it for people who weren't typically wrestling fans (ie, most of my friends who came over last night).
That said, here are my thoughts on TNA and WWE's shows...
-We were glued to Impact for the first hour since it ran unopposed. I thought the Steel Asylum would have a lot more action, and completely agree with the Impact Zone's chants of "This is bullshit!" when Homicide came in with whatever he had. LAME. But we saw the TNA return of Jeff Hardy. It didn't really make since, but apparently Hardy is coming back into TNA and is looking at the X-Division.
-I would like to have seen this be more of a showcase of the X-Division. These are the most fun guys on the planet to watch do their thing, and within about 10 minutes this match was over.
-How much 5-hour energy does the TNA roster drink? That stuff was everywhere.
-With that motorcade it was almost like Barack Obama was coming to Impact.
-Security wasn't doing that great of a job at Impact. Sure, keep out Mick Foley, but let whoever run rampant in the back attacking people. WAT?
-As I predicted, Hogan came on at 8 in the hopes to run against Bret Hart. Honestly, we only watched the entrances of both, not really getting too much of what they said. We finally settled on the Bret Hart-Shawn Michaels lovefest. No Sharpshooter? Oh well, he'll be back out at the end of the night to do one. Wait, no? Vince McMahon kicks him in the nuts and that's IT?!
-Barbed Wire Massacre and Full Metal Mayhem was on tap for Impact? Sweet! I can't wait! Hang on...you mean while I was watching Bret Hart and Shawn Michaels HUG, Hulk Hogan ripped up the format for the rest of the show? Damn you, Hulk! But I guess he had to after Rhino got hurt. Abyss being in a match by himself doesn't sound all that thrilling.
-But Abyss did show up to wrestle Samoa Joe. I thought it was an okay match - nothing special. My friends were crapping all over Samoa Joe for not being in peak physical condition. I guess if you don't know what Joe is capable of, you'll come to that conclusion.
-So Bobby Lashley finally turns heel. Maybe that guy will finally get a personality in wrestling. Seriously, I can respect that these people try to make a living, but he doesn't sincerely want to wrestle if he's still making contacts to MMA. I can't get behind Bobby Lashley.
-Val Venis was a legitimate surprise, a free agent who is often overlooked. I thought he was great to interact with the Beautiful People. A hell of a lot better than Kip James anyway.
-The last bit of JeriShow vs. DX was pretty sweet. Lots of nearfalls and false finishes. Jericho can't wrestle on RAW again (till he gets drafted at least), so we'll see how he tries weaseling his way back again. Also, was Jericho silently mocking Hogan with those cups to the ear?
-While I enjoyed cameo appearances to make the night have a big-show feel, I hope TNA doesn't have only but a small handful of these guys actually show up again next week. Brian Knobbs can't even walk.
-I loved Angle/AJ but my friends crapped all over it, too. Lots of nearfalls. I can kind of see what they were seeing, as most of the reversals ended up looking the same. I guess we can be thankful for there not being outside interference (minus Flair's glare), but seeing the same counter multiple times got kind of drab.
-We didn't get to see nearly any of Kofi/Orton. I wanted to see this match since the feud has been getting good reviews, but I thought we'd invested too much time into AJ/Angle to switch.
Overall, I thought the night was intriguing for both companies. TNA didn't hit it out of the park with wrestling, but I think made up for that with interest for what is happening between AJ/Flair, who attacked half a dozen wrestlers backstage and what Hogan and Bischoff have in store for the company.
WWE scored a major coup with the Hitman, and even moreso since he'll be around through WrestleMania, apparently. I'm stoked to see Stu Hart get into the WWE Hall of Fame and it will be fun to see where the Hart/McMahon saga goes from here.
If last night was any indication, 2010 is going to be an exciting year for professional wrestling fans.
Monday, January 4, 2010
Top 9 of '09
Below are my Top 9 favorite memories. This is 2009 in review.
1&2. David's wedding week / New Year's Eve
I've covered David's wedding week and the Jingle Bell in December's Top 5.
3. Nidan
I've covered my nidan test and promotion in rather small detail here and here.
Having had some time to look back, it really seemed to be my last big hurrah with Metamora Martial Arts for the time being. Aside from only a handful of appearances since the summer, my biggest presence with the program has been virtual.
I will be back in a limited capacity for the next two months teaching at Riverview, though I'd like to receive some training myself. Three months over the summer doesn't cut it for me.
I honestly believe if the cost of the Ireland trip wasn't in the way, I would've been more serious about taking up MMA this fall and advanced my martial arts knowledge. Maybe someday.
It's been disappointing knowing that I won't be receiving much further training myself for the time being. Teaching will be okay, but I still like to sit back and let somebody else take charge. I guess 2010 is up for new challenges in that direction.
Nidan has been a nice end of a chapter. I think it's time to turn the page to a new one. Sensei Adam? That's got a nice ring to it.
4. End of an Era
This year marked the end of an era in the local music scene, as I've already noted.
I've noticed that due to venue issues and whatnot, I've gone to far less shows than I used to. There were times in high school where there would be a show to go to every week. It seems to me I can only make a few badass shows a year now.
2009 also saw other new concert acts for me, which included George Thorogood & The Destroyers, Megadeth, The Gaslight Anthem and Murder By Death (twice).
5. Planting the Harvester
July marked the second year in a row that we put on a dumb little wrestling show in the backyard. This one didn't have quite the magic the first one did, so I'm not too stoked on a repeat. I think we had anticipated the second one so much it wouldn't live up to our expectations no matter what we did.
However, I still love the creativity of everybody involved. Sam's green man appearance topped everything, but the marijuana-themed match for the Bud Belt between Scott Stoner, J-Mysterio, Kevin Hash, and first-ever champion The Undertoker was genius too.
The Harvester of Sorrow and Stone Cold Steve Adam are currently tied at 1-1. If there's a rematch next year, it's going to be ridiculous.
6. My Birthday
I had honestly forgotten what I did for my birthday this year. I remembered last year's, but thought it was this year's.
Once I read about it to remember it, my birthday was, to steal a line from Bob, "some bomb-ass shit." I ate with my family at Aztekita, opened presents, played ultimate frisbee, and went to Buffalo Wild Wings (so it must've been a Tuesday). Almost every close friend I had in high school reunited for the game of frisbee, so that was sweet.
7. Sam's 21st
It was my first time going to Sam's club, as Beau called it, and lo and behold, I was on the house rules: "No Adam Bocklers." This was in addition to a rule I can't remember, and "Nobody is on a fucking boat."
I'll be prepared to fight the next time I go to his place. This particular day, Rego met with me with a katana. On New Year's, David proceeds to get me in a clinch and we grapple. Be warned, friends of mine, I'm coming with guns loaded at the next party he hosts.
8. Shift Mgr.
A lot of people hate their job. So do I, at times, but I've said it before and I'll say it again - it's a nice gig for me, it's relatively easy and I'm hoping it leads to something better.
This was my first full year as a manager. Lots of times I don't know what I'm doing still. But there are a lot of fun people I get to work with and a lot of characters that come in; don't get me wrong, there's some real douches I've had the misfortune of getting stuck with.
9. School
I'd be leaving out a lot if I left school off this list. I met a lot of cool people this year. I still think the majority of Bradley students are douchebags, but I've decided to let my guard down this year and have a more open mind to some of the people that attend the school.
Plus I completed a lot of papers and projects I'm pretty with.
1&2. David's wedding week / New Year's Eve
I've covered David's wedding week and the Jingle Bell in December's Top 5.
3. Nidan
I've covered my nidan test and promotion in rather small detail here and here.
Having had some time to look back, it really seemed to be my last big hurrah with Metamora Martial Arts for the time being. Aside from only a handful of appearances since the summer, my biggest presence with the program has been virtual.
I will be back in a limited capacity for the next two months teaching at Riverview, though I'd like to receive some training myself. Three months over the summer doesn't cut it for me.
I honestly believe if the cost of the Ireland trip wasn't in the way, I would've been more serious about taking up MMA this fall and advanced my martial arts knowledge. Maybe someday.
It's been disappointing knowing that I won't be receiving much further training myself for the time being. Teaching will be okay, but I still like to sit back and let somebody else take charge. I guess 2010 is up for new challenges in that direction.
Nidan has been a nice end of a chapter. I think it's time to turn the page to a new one. Sensei Adam? That's got a nice ring to it.
4. End of an Era
This year marked the end of an era in the local music scene, as I've already noted.
I've noticed that due to venue issues and whatnot, I've gone to far less shows than I used to. There were times in high school where there would be a show to go to every week. It seems to me I can only make a few badass shows a year now.
2009 also saw other new concert acts for me, which included George Thorogood & The Destroyers, Megadeth, The Gaslight Anthem and Murder By Death (twice).
5. Planting the Harvester
July marked the second year in a row that we put on a dumb little wrestling show in the backyard. This one didn't have quite the magic the first one did, so I'm not too stoked on a repeat. I think we had anticipated the second one so much it wouldn't live up to our expectations no matter what we did.
However, I still love the creativity of everybody involved. Sam's green man appearance topped everything, but the marijuana-themed match for the Bud Belt between Scott Stoner, J-Mysterio, Kevin Hash, and first-ever champion The Undertoker was genius too.
The Harvester of Sorrow and Stone Cold Steve Adam are currently tied at 1-1. If there's a rematch next year, it's going to be ridiculous.
6. My Birthday
I had honestly forgotten what I did for my birthday this year. I remembered last year's, but thought it was this year's.
Once I read about it to remember it, my birthday was, to steal a line from Bob, "some bomb-ass shit." I ate with my family at Aztekita, opened presents, played ultimate frisbee, and went to Buffalo Wild Wings (so it must've been a Tuesday). Almost every close friend I had in high school reunited for the game of frisbee, so that was sweet.
7. Sam's 21st
It was my first time going to Sam's club, as Beau called it, and lo and behold, I was on the house rules: "No Adam Bocklers." This was in addition to a rule I can't remember, and "Nobody is on a fucking boat."
I'll be prepared to fight the next time I go to his place. This particular day, Rego met with me with a katana. On New Year's, David proceeds to get me in a clinch and we grapple. Be warned, friends of mine, I'm coming with guns loaded at the next party he hosts.
8. Shift Mgr.
A lot of people hate their job. So do I, at times, but I've said it before and I'll say it again - it's a nice gig for me, it's relatively easy and I'm hoping it leads to something better.
This was my first full year as a manager. Lots of times I don't know what I'm doing still. But there are a lot of fun people I get to work with and a lot of characters that come in; don't get me wrong, there's some real douches I've had the misfortune of getting stuck with.
9. School
I'd be leaving out a lot if I left school off this list. I met a lot of cool people this year. I still think the majority of Bradley students are douchebags, but I've decided to let my guard down this year and have a more open mind to some of the people that attend the school.
Plus I completed a lot of papers and projects I'm pretty with.
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